It’s been a rough day. The barista fumbled your drive-through handoff—that’s gonna stain. Then your earbuds quit working, so you had to listen to your coworker pop his fingers every two minutes. Now, while waiting at the stoplight on the drive home, a gigantic truck pulls up beside you. It blocks out the sun. The blaring music rattles your very soul. And it’s sporting that bumper sticker.
Are you feeling annoyed—by everyone and everything? And what’s God doing in all of this, anyway? Does He care? Often, on our most difficult days, it can be hard to find a positive perspective and show kindness to ourselves and others.
If you need a little help believing that God cares about your pain, if you could stand to see your life in a different light, if you want to see others the way God sees them—then give these three prayers a try.
Remember God’s Compassion
If you want to treat yourself and others with kindness, you’re going to need help. Humans don’t have a solid track record when it comes to our behavior. We’re prone to jealousy, pettiness, anger, laziness, and greed, just to name a few. Those traits tend to get in the way of showing kindness. Only one person managed to walk this earth without being weighed down by those things. His name is Jesus, and whatever He did is probably worth noting.
And what did Jesus do?
- He paid attention to those who were ignored.
- He healed those no one else would touch.
- He trusted others before they’d proven themselves.
- He helped unexpected people in unexpected ways.
- He loved those who hated Him.
- He showed mercy when others wanted violence.
- In short, He was kind.
Jesus’ love didn’t stop with simple, passing, transactional kindness. He took that love as far as it could go by willingly allowing Himself to be killed on a cross to restore our broken relationship with God forever. He did it all for us. He did it all for you.
A Prayer for Compassion
The next time you feel like the world’s turning against you, stop and remember how Jesus lived. Remember the mercy He showed others. Recognize His sacrifice for you. And then pray this prayer:
Dear God, I’m overwhelmed. I’m frustrated and annoyed by all of the things that just keep going wrong. I know You’re bigger than my problems, but I don’t always live like I believe that. I’ve lashed out at others. I’ve complained. I’ve believed the worst. You never did those things, Jesus. I want to be more like You. I want to love others the way You love them, even if it costs me. You showed me how to live this way, Jesus. Thank You. Thank You for Your example. Thank You for laying down Your life for me. Help me to live that way, too. Please give me the grace to see others the way You see them. Please help me love my neighbors like You do. Today, help me choose kindness—like You’ve shown me. In Jesus’ name, amen
Kindness Is a Choice
When life throws the kitchen sink at us or when people treat us poorly, it feels great to rage right back, doesn’t it? To retaliate. To fight fire with fire. “That’ll show ’em,” you think. Don’t get mad—get even. Right?
Feeling angry is natural—this much is true. It’s going to happen as long you have breath in your lungs. Responding in anger, though? Well, that’s a choice, and an easy one at that. That’s often why we reach for it. But it’s usually not a very good choice in the grand scheme of things. The problem with this response is that it often keeps the pain in circulation—your pain and the pain of others. It validates the incomplete narrative you’re assuming about others and gives them a reason to believe the worst about you.
But, it is a choice. So you don’t have to pick it.
Jesus suggests another choice.
Jesus talked a lot about how we respond to others who mistreat us, perhaps most famously in a sermon He gave to a crowd who had plenty to be angry about. Here’s what He said:
“Here’s another old saying that deserves a second look: ‘Eye for eye, tooth for tooth.’ Is that going to get us anywhere? Here’s what I propose: ‘Don’t hit back at all.’ If someone strikes you, stand there and take it. If someone drags you into court and sues for the shirt off your back, giftwrap your best coat and make a present of it. And if someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously.” Matthew 5:38-42 MSG
It was a shocking message then, and it’s a shocking message now. And don’t mistake Jesus’ words—He’s not telling you to be a doormat. He’s talking about choosing a response that doesn’t aim to simply even the score. He’s talking about choosing a response that turns the whole game on its head: loving-kindness. Kindness in action.
Jesus didn’t just talk about choosing kindness; He showed kindness over and over again in His ministry—even when it was the hardest thing to do.
Two others, both criminals, were taken along with him for execution. When they got to the place called Skull Hill, they crucified him, along with the criminals, one on his right, the other on his left. Jesus prayed, “Father, forgive them; they don’t know what they’re doing.” Dividing up his clothes, they threw dice for them. The people stood there staring at Jesus, and the ringleaders made faces, taunting, “He saved others. Let’s see him save himself! The Messiah of God—ha! The Chosen—ha!” The soldiers also came up and poked fun at him, making a game of it. They toasted him with sour wine: “So you’re King of the Jews! Save yourself!” Printed over him was a sign: ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ᴋɪɴɢ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴊᴇᴡs. One of the criminals hanging alongside cursed him: “Some Messiah you are! Save yourself! Save us!” But the other one made him shut up: “Have you no fear of God? You’re getting the same as him. We deserve this, but not him—he did nothing to deserve this.” Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you enter your kingdom.” He said, “Don’t worry, I will. Today you will join me in paradise.” Luke 23:32-43 MSG
It won’t be easy. When you’re tempted to respond to your frustration with more frustration, remember Jesus’ example. Ask Him to help you choose kindness by praying this prayer.
A Prayer for Kindness
Heavenly Father, I’m angry. I’m frustrated with so many things right now. Selfishly, I want to make others feel the same pain I’m feeling. But I know that’s not what You’ve called me to do. That’s not the way You’ve shown me to live. You said to choose kindness. You showed me how to love others, even when they don’t love me first—and even if they don’t love me back. You forgave the very people who put You on a cross to die—You loved even them! Help me to choose Your way, Jesus. Help me to choose kindness in the face of opposition. Help me to choose love in the face of hate. I can’t do it without You. Guide my interactions today. Thank You for Your example, Jesus. Thank You for loving me before I ever loved You. Thank You for looking on me with kindness. Today, I want to look on others that same way. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Kindness Believes the Best of Others
Okay, remember how this day started? Careless baristas, annoying coworkers, and rude drivers?
But what if you’re telling the wrong story?
What if that barista wasn’t so much careless as they were exhausted from working back-to-back shifts while taking care of a loved one at home?
What if that coworker wasn’t trying to be annoying? Maybe they’re dealing with pressures at work that you know nothing about.
What if that driver had no malice toward you but was just celebrating a good day?
If you’re going to write the stories of those you don’t know, why not write hopeful ones?
Choosing to believe the best of others is, in a way, a form of forgiveness.
Choosing to believe the best of others is, in a way, a form of forgiveness. It removes the artificial barriers you’ve built against them and helps you see them as your neighbor—as a child of God loved by Jesus.
And Jesus had something profound to say about how we treat our neighbors.
One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”
“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘… Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:28-31 NIV
Loving our neighbors is one of the two most important things we can do. Period. It’s not a suggestion, either. It’s a command. In God’s kingdom, kindness matters.
Being kind isn’t just for warm fuzzies, either. It makes a difference. When you see others as your neighbors, you open yourself up to opportunities to make a difference in their lives. You can encourage that worn-out barista. You can offer support to your stressed-out coworker. You can celebrate the good day someone else is having.
It won’t always be easy to love others, though. Sometimes, your instincts are right and people are just being cruel on purpose. We’ll need God’s help. He’s an expert at loving difficult people—after all, He’s seen us all at our worst, and He continues to love us the most.
We can’t change others. Only God can do that. What God commands us to do is love His children. That’s our part.
Let’s do it with humility.
A Prayer for Empathy
Today, ask Jesus to help you treat your neighbors with kindness by praying this prayer:
Dear God, You love me, even on my absolute worst days. You love me because I’m Yours and not because of what I do. Today, help me to love others that same way—not based on how they treat me, but based on the fact that they’re Your children and my neighbors. Today, help me to consider my neighbors with kindness and hope. When my neighbors let me down, help me forgive them quickly and sincerely, as I would hope they’d do for me. Father, help me to remove the hurtful barriers of assumption, prejudice, and bias that I so easily put in place. Help me to see the needs of others today, and help me to meet those needs with kindness. Thank You for loving me, today and every day. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Kindness Takes Practice and Patience
Today, thank God for one way you’ve seen His kindness and compassion in your life. Then, commit to one way you can be kind to someone else today. After all, loving God and loving others is nothing less than the most important stuff you can do today.