A full season. Full of holiday parties, joyful music, decorations, and traditions. But for many, it's also full of grief, anxiety, and loneliness.
The anxiety of seeing family and not knowing if politics or the way you raise your kids will be brought up first. The pressure to create magical holiday season experiences for your family. And the feeling like no matter what you do, it's never enough to make the season feel anything but peaceful.
One Christmas, I found myself trying to make the most of every moment with my kids while also mourning the loss of a close friend. So in the midst of the holiday hustle of seeing lights, decorating the tree, baking cookies, making gingerbread houses, and traveling to see family, I was also trying to process grief.
During that Christmas, I found myself craving the “silent nights” and “peace on earth” moments, only to find that I was drowning with anxiety. It all felt like too much.
Has the Christmas season ever felt overwhelming to you? Keep reading—I found peace at Christmas despite my circumstances, and you can too.
Jesus Is the Prince of Peace
When our minds are overwhelmed with too many to-dos and too little time, it can be hard to remember the abundance of peace that comes from God (Philippians 4:7). We’re not talking about the peace of having enough money to buy your kids the presents they want or the peace that comes with getting the perfect Christmas card photo. We’re talking about peace for your soul.
Jesus is the only one who can provide true, restorative peace between us and God and others.
Jesus is referred to as the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6). What does this mean? It means that Jesus is the only one who can provide true, restorative peace between us and God and others.
While holiday traditions and activities are fun, we can’t forget why these things were started. They were created to help us celebrate the Prince of Peace.
How Can I Celebrate Christmas When Life Is Hard?
Have you ever celebrated a coworker's promotion while feeling overlooked and hurt? Or attended a baby shower while grieving a miscarriage? Or wished a newly married couple congratulations at their wedding while in a fight with your spouse?
It can feel awkward to celebrate when we aren’t fully present to what we are celebrating. When our mind is preoccupied with hurt, grief, or anxiety, it’s easy to take our eyes off the true reason for the Christmas season, and view it as a time we just have to get through—not as a celebration.
My perspective shift came from understanding what was occupying my mind. The celebration of Jesus didn’t have my attention. My holiday to-dos did. And my grief over my friend who had passed away. And my frustration when my loved ones were critical, and not graceful.
Learning how to be fully present in the holiday season, even in the middle of strong feelings and hard experiences, helped me find the overwhelming peace I was looking for.
3 Practical Ways to Find Peace at Christmas Time
Jesus came to bring peace and extend peace to the whole world. So try these three tips as you seek peace this holiday season.
1. Release your worries to God.
What are the things weighing on your heart this Christmas season? Maybe this is your first holiday without a loved one. Maybe you just lost your job. Maybe you can’t bear another fight with your spouse over money. Whatever the worries of this season are, give them to God through prayer.
Prayer helps us bring our hopes, frustrations, fears, and doubts to God. Try this example prayer to get started.
Pray this prayer for Christmas peace:
God, this season is heavy. In the midst of the heaviness, help me to show joy, grace, and love to myself and others. I release my worries to You and thank You for the abundance of peace You give me in return. In Jesus' name, amen.
2. Accept His overwhelming peace.
God promises His followers an abundance of peace. Colossians 3:15 says “The peace that Christ gives is to guide you in the decisions you make…” In this full season, let the peace of Christ guide your way. Let the peace of Christ be your response when you get invited to one more Christmas party or when your in-laws bring up hot topics around the dinner table. Accept His overwhelming peace and let that peace guide your way of living this holiday season.
How do we accept His peace? We start with recognizing God's power. He's in control, and we're not. We can't force friends to change or family members to respond. When we try to take too much control, worry, anxiety, and despair tend to follow. But when we trust that God is in the process of helping and healing the world, it's a little easier to find peace, even when facing conflict, pain, and grief.
3. Celebrate!
We can feel pain, and yet still be at peace. That’s because true peace comes from our trust in God, who controls every detail in the universe. Even though life might feel chaotic and painful, we can trust in God’s plan and power. So you can mourn a loss, feel frustrated about relationship drama, or feel overwhelmed by work, and celebrate the Prince of Peace at the same time.
We don’t celebrate to ignore or distract ourselves from life. Instead, our celebration is a declaration that we can find peace in Jesus despite the very real struggles we’re facing.
I like to think about Mary, the mother of Jesus. Her whole world turned upside down when she heard that she’d give birth to Jesus. But even in the middle of complex emotions, stress, and the challenges of pregnancy, she praised God. So let’s follow Mary’s lead this Christmas and celebrate our Savior in the middle of our stressful, complicated lives.
You Can Find Peace This Year
What I’ve come to realize is the busyness of the holiday season has not changed. As my kids get older, the busyness seems to heighten. But what has changed is my perspective on where my calm and peace come from in a busy season like this.
It might not feel like a very merry Christmas this year, but you can still find peace. Why? Because God is still on the throne, working all things together for good. It might not feel like it right now, but when we reflect on the story of Christmas, we can see God’s consistent, compassionate love on display. So rest in Him as you navigate the storms of life, and let Him be your peace this Christmas.