It’s that time of year again. The aisles at Walmart have been filled with the pink and pretty since Santa parked his sleigh. It’s the completely inescapable and often dreaded: Valentine’s Day. Today is about love, and you’d better get with the program. But what if you’re not with the program? When you’re single on Valentine’s Day, it can lead your mind to a weird place where you question your worth with thoughts like: Candy, cards, and flowers are smothering the earth, but where’s my Valentine? Um … am I datable?
When we’re not in a relationship or we don’t have a hot date lined up when February 14 rolls around, we seem to internalize this false message: Everybody but you is being shown love today. Instead of feeling loved on, we feel left out. Society tricks us into thinking we’ve been excluded from a universal truth: You already are loved—every day and all the time.
The truth is, being single is not a “status” to shake off of you. Nor is it a curse that separates you from the rest of society. It’s a gift. That’s not just the Christian thing to say. It truly comes with powerful benefits. It’s the gift of flexibility. It’s the gift of freedom to lovingly serve God and others deeply and intentionally without the weight (responsibility) of lifelong devotion.
So, here’s the thing. Stop asking yourself, “Am I datable?” If you’re hoping to date someone someday, the better question is, “Am I someone I’d like to date?” What are you looking for in someone else? Don’t make a shallow list of physical traits or fleeting feelings. Look for someone who’s chasing after God with everything they have. If you want to spend your life with someone, that’s the only item needed on your “datable/not datable” list. Then, start being what you’re looking for!
Without further ado, here are 5 creative ways to show some love on Valentine’s Day, none of which require having a hot date. All of which will remind you and others that they’re already loved. All of which will shape you into someone who’s living life from a place of understanding your worth in who God created you to be.
- Pay it forward … uh, or backward. Treat yourself to a drive-through breakfast and pay for the meal of the car behind you. Go the extra mile and prepare a Valentine’s Day card in advance and ask the person at the drive thru window to give it to the car behind you.
- Throw a shindig. Have a Galentine’s Day Party or a Bromance Dance. Show some love to your besties by throwing a kickback just to appreciate them. Yes, fellas, this works for you too. Make a playlist on Spotify, buy a few snacks and decorations, and just hang out.
- Write a love note. Dust off your handwriting skills—we’re going snail-mail. Write a letter to a few people you look up to telling them all of the ways you appreciate them. Tell them how knowing them has helped make you into a better version of yourself. Send it on Valentine’s Day.
- Schedule a playdate. That’s right, find some tiny people whose parents are putting on the fancy clothes to go out, and bring the fun to a night in. This isn’t babysitting. This is a reminder of the innocence of life and how to enjoy every moment. P.S. you might even be helping some little people begin a healthy understanding that just because others are in love (their parents) doesn’t make them any less important or lovable themselves.
- Learn someone else’s life story. We’re surrounded with opportunities to fight loneliness by simply listening to those who live their lives mostly unheard. Find a local mission partner you can serve by bringing dinner to someone who’s homeless. Let them do most of the talking. Bring candles and a tablecloth.
Here’s to an unforgettable Valentine’s Day! Fill it with as many chances as you can find to show some love to others, and whatever you do—stay off social media.