We’ve all been there. You scroll on Instagram and see the perfect relationship photo where you can’t help but think, “Wow, they are couple goals.” But we all know relationships require way more work than what we see on social media. So, how can we become real couple goals?
I nerd out for the Bible, so that’s naturally where I looked for the answer to this question. And if anyone knew about relationships, it was Jesus. He built close friendships with 12 guys, worked alongside many faith leaders, and mentored and encouraged thousands in His years of leading.
Sure, He found Himself in some debates about life and faith, but He always seemed to show love and care throughout every interaction. Why? Because His driving goal was to serve those around Him.
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Matthew 20:28 NLT
The key to successful relationships is consistently serving those around you. And although serving is definitely the key to becoming couple goals, it applies to all types of relationships—not just romantic ones.
Jesus modeled His love for those around Him through serving their needs above His own. When we do this, we show people that they’re important, they matter, and we value them.
Serving that builds relationships can play out in a couple of different ways.
1. Serve others practically.
First, we look to meet people’s needs in practical ways. We practice seeing their needs and desires as more important than ours. Paul highlighted this when he wrote:
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. Philippians 2:3-4 NIV
We can serve in simple ways like doing chores for our spouse (hello, couple goals), cleaning up our coworker’s area so that they can leave early, or simply buying a coffee and randomly showing up for a friend. Small acts of service on your part can be deeply significant to someone else.
I have often been asked how I build trusting relationships so quickly, because anyone who knows me knows that I make friends fast. The answer is that I have made serving a priority in my life, and it can be as simple as moving furniture.
Our office carpets get cleaned every quarter. The day before this happens, we move all of our furniture so that the floor is clear. One time I knew that our team had a busy morning the following day, which would make moving the furniture back into the office a challenge.
I saw an opportunity to serve.
So I showed up early that next morning and moved the furniture back in. It was a practical way to show my coworkers that I value them and their time. Most of the pastors in our office felt so appreciated and shared how much it lightened the stress they were feeling that day. I set their needs above my own, and it showed how I cared for them. What’s something you could do to show care for your significant other, a coworker, a neighbor, or a friend?
2. Serve together with others.
The second way that we can strengthen our relationships is by serving together. When we serve others together we model what Jesus said is one of the most important commands:
“… ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” Matthew 22:39 NIV
Serving with your spouse or significant other is a great way to become couple goals, because you both realize how to become more selfless by putting the needs of others before your own.
Even if you’re single, serving with friends is a great way to build your relationships.
Here are some easy and fun ways to serve with friends, coworkers, your LifeGroup, or your spouse.
• Serve at your church on the weekend. There are so many fun ways to serve together at church that will serve both others and you. Whether it’s caring for the next generation, greeting everyone who walks through the doors, or setting up behind the scenes, there’s an opportunity for you. Find your fit at a local Life.Church campus today!
• Serve with a Local Mission Partner. Life.Church partners with fantastic organizations in your community. These organizations bring long-term restoration by focusing on families, education, well-being, justice, and community empowerment. Learn more about partners in your community.
• Serve at Life.Church Online. Maybe you’re reading this and realizing that you want to serve but don’t live near a Life.Church location. Don’t worry, you can still serve with others! You can positively impact lives around the globe through Life.Church Online.
Serving others is the key to building friendships, becoming couple goals, bringing joy and longevity to your LifeGroup, and keeping your marriage strong and centered on Jesus. So what are you waiting for? Take one step today to show others that you care about them.